I suffer from Mom Guilt...a lot, a lot more than I'd like to admit. It's a challenge being a working mom but it's one I put on myself. Yes I do have to work, especially now that we have a mortgage, but also I want to work. I want it all, a family and a career.
Maybe I'm not all that different from other moms but I feel like it...a lot. I rarely give up time with Liam. I'm really lucky to have a husband that let's me train basically whenever I want (early mornings before Liam is up or immediately after he's asleep) and a bestie that is the most understand human to ever have walked the face of the earth. I work but I rarely even take a lunch so I get a little extra time with Liam each day. I drop him off at daycare or Grandma's house (depending on the day) rush to work, work and rush to pick him up. I don't workout when he's awake, I don't hang out with friends.... I read to him, play with him, change him, whatever he needs. I try to be just in the moment with him as much as possible.
I swear I'm not obsessive. I just want to be his mom, I want the time I have with him to be all about him. I want him to know he has all my love for everyday we have. I know a lot of this is because I can't have more children, I value all the time I have with him so much knowing I will not experience these firsts again. Time moves so quickly, I just want to soak in these years.
Not to say it isn't hard sometimes, I get tired and frustrated. I want just a little time to myself. Who doesn't?
So once in a great while I take a little "me" time. Usually I'll let Liam sleepover at the Grandparent's house. They love having him, he loves being there. I love getting some extra rest or cleaning done. But even then I feel so guilty. Or on the days I do take a lunch (and go for a run), that extra hour eats at me...even if I run an errand without him on the weekend, it just kills me sometimes.
But why? I mean really why not take a little break once in a while? How do men do it and feel nothing, they (seemingly) have no guilt at all.
I push myself so hard, I run myself ragged...the most important thing I can do in this life is a be a good mom to him but I need to take care of myself too.
There is no right answer, is there?
Showing posts with label parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label parenting. Show all posts
May 21, 2013
May 7, 2013
We now live in our forever home!
Part of the reason for my lack of posting is we finally moved into our forever home! It was a bit crazy there in the very end, everyday was all maybe we can close today, maybe xyz will be done and the bank will call and.... and lots of xyz taking three more days than everyone said it would. But in the end? In the end we are still in. We closed a week ago yesterday (Monday afternoon, which btw not ideal at all but do-able).
I'd been packing slowly but surely every night a box or seven depending on my mood and energy level. I packed a crap ton of small boxes since I'd been saving diaper and wipe boxes for....ever. But that kinda worked out too, it made unpacking (which also has been a little every night) much easier. V and I took last Tuesday off and did a vast majority of the moving our selves while Liam was at daycare. When my in-laws got off work that night they brought the big furniture over in one trip with the use of a giant truck from V's work.
One thing I didn't fully grasp was how stressful this whole thing would be on Liam. We had visited the house once or twice a week for the last four months, in the last 4-6 weeks he knew where we were going and clapped every time we pulled up. Each time we came into the house he ran around and laughed with amazing joy.... On Tuesday about 3:30pm I hit a wall, I could not move one more box, I went and picked Liam up early and went to the house just he and I. (I had made his room priority #1 that morning so it was completely set up upon his arrival). The moment we walked through the door he was ultra clingy I thought ut oh, this is not typical. Something about seeing all his things in this new place stressed him out. He started to whine and I said something I've said to him countless times (at the old house) show me what you want Liam. And the tears started, he couldn't show me what he wanted, he had no idea where anything was....my heart broke. We spent the next ~2 hours just us walking around, I'd let him explore and point out where things were but he wouldn't let me get too far away from him (which was fine by me). I asked V's mom to watch Liam at our house for the next two days so he could get used to it here, she said he was pretty clingy the first day but each day has gotten better and now you'd have no idea it was stressful at all.
I'm so in love with our house, I feel like I can breathe here. We have so much storage and space to spread out. One huge thing that we couldn't do at the rental was eat dinner together, just the layout of the kitchen only allowed one of us to sit at the table while Liam ate in his highchair (typically V or I would stand off to the side so we sorta ate together). Now family dinners are a nightly event! It's the simple things in life that really matter!
Much Love,
Jen
I'd been packing slowly but surely every night a box or seven depending on my mood and energy level. I packed a crap ton of small boxes since I'd been saving diaper and wipe boxes for....ever. But that kinda worked out too, it made unpacking (which also has been a little every night) much easier. V and I took last Tuesday off and did a vast majority of the moving our selves while Liam was at daycare. When my in-laws got off work that night they brought the big furniture over in one trip with the use of a giant truck from V's work.
One thing I didn't fully grasp was how stressful this whole thing would be on Liam. We had visited the house once or twice a week for the last four months, in the last 4-6 weeks he knew where we were going and clapped every time we pulled up. Each time we came into the house he ran around and laughed with amazing joy.... On Tuesday about 3:30pm I hit a wall, I could not move one more box, I went and picked Liam up early and went to the house just he and I. (I had made his room priority #1 that morning so it was completely set up upon his arrival). The moment we walked through the door he was ultra clingy I thought ut oh, this is not typical. Something about seeing all his things in this new place stressed him out. He started to whine and I said something I've said to him countless times (at the old house) show me what you want Liam. And the tears started, he couldn't show me what he wanted, he had no idea where anything was....my heart broke. We spent the next ~2 hours just us walking around, I'd let him explore and point out where things were but he wouldn't let me get too far away from him (which was fine by me). I asked V's mom to watch Liam at our house for the next two days so he could get used to it here, she said he was pretty clingy the first day but each day has gotten better and now you'd have no idea it was stressful at all.
I'm so in love with our house, I feel like I can breathe here. We have so much storage and space to spread out. One huge thing that we couldn't do at the rental was eat dinner together, just the layout of the kitchen only allowed one of us to sit at the table while Liam ate in his highchair (typically V or I would stand off to the side so we sorta ate together). Now family dinners are a nightly event! It's the simple things in life that really matter!
Much Love,
Jen
December 18, 2012
Unimaginable Saddness for Newtown, CT
I feel weird even writing about this, I just wish it were all a horrible-horrible dream. The pain of the whole town of Newtown, CT is unimaginable. I've been strategically avoiding the media coverage, it just hits a different place in my heart now that I'm a mom. Unfortunately you can't avoid it forever, I started listening to little bits of President Obama's speech last night while I folded laundry (and Liam unfolded it, lol). I cried hearing him speak the names of the 20 children lost (I changed the channel so I don't know if he spoke the 6 lost adults names). I cried on the way to work as they discussed the funerals of those little children. It all just breaks my heart.
It's unfortunate that tragic events like this happen, and it seems like this one has shaken us all a little deeper. I refuse to think about it in too much depth....I just can't. Often times, when something like this happens I get a bit consumed and read/watch everything I can get my hands on, like much of America. (Personally I think this is a bit of the problem) Not this time though, I'm acting on gut instinct like on Friday night when I abruptly cancelled Liam's sleepover at G'ma's. I just needed him home, much more than I needed a date night. Instead our evening was full of toddler giggles and random hugs (Liam's new thing) and I wouldn't have it any other way.
This horrible event has had a seemingly universal effect on all of us, we're all grabbing our loved ones, no matter the age, and pulling them just a little closer for a moment longer. On Saturday afternoon as I was putting Liam down for his nap he rested his head on my shoulder and instantly fell asleep, instead of laying him down I sat in the rocker in his room and just held him, it was so peaceful as he pressed against my chest I could have stayed there for three hours (and I considered it). I slowly lay him down after a good 20 minutes, he peaked open one eye and smiled before falling back to sleep. It was priceless. And instead of scurrying off to the gym while Liam napped I snuggled in V's arms while he watched his man shows.
We've all been taken back, we're all making vows to be kinder, gentler, more patient and more present....I just wish it didn't have to come as a result of this unspeakable tragedy, and I hope we are all still living by these vows in three months.
I hope and pray that this madness ends, that our eyes fewer and fewer of this horrible events until there are no such things. I realize full well that the likelihood of all this is essentially nonexistent but I a girl mom can hope and dream.
Much Love,
Jen
It's unfortunate that tragic events like this happen, and it seems like this one has shaken us all a little deeper. I refuse to think about it in too much depth....I just can't. Often times, when something like this happens I get a bit consumed and read/watch everything I can get my hands on, like much of America. (Personally I think this is a bit of the problem) Not this time though, I'm acting on gut instinct like on Friday night when I abruptly cancelled Liam's sleepover at G'ma's. I just needed him home, much more than I needed a date night. Instead our evening was full of toddler giggles and random hugs (Liam's new thing) and I wouldn't have it any other way.
This horrible event has had a seemingly universal effect on all of us, we're all grabbing our loved ones, no matter the age, and pulling them just a little closer for a moment longer. On Saturday afternoon as I was putting Liam down for his nap he rested his head on my shoulder and instantly fell asleep, instead of laying him down I sat in the rocker in his room and just held him, it was so peaceful as he pressed against my chest I could have stayed there for three hours (and I considered it). I slowly lay him down after a good 20 minutes, he peaked open one eye and smiled before falling back to sleep. It was priceless. And instead of scurrying off to the gym while Liam napped I snuggled in V's arms while he watched his man shows.
We've all been taken back, we're all making vows to be kinder, gentler, more patient and more present....I just wish it didn't have to come as a result of this unspeakable tragedy, and I hope we are all still living by these vows in three months.
I hope and pray that this madness ends, that our eyes fewer and fewer of this horrible events until there are no such things. I realize full well that the likelihood of all this is essentially nonexistent but I a
Much Love,
Jen
November 15, 2012
Hold Your Babies Extra Close Today
Last night a little boy died in our community, he had been fighting aggressive brain cancer for more than half his short four years and couldn't battle on any longer. His parents did all they could, even the most aggressive treatments, then when the cancer came back for the third time their son said to them "no more pokes" and they agreed, they treated him at home. I followed their journey through his mom's blog and on facebook never actually meeting any member of his family only attending fundraising functions here and there.
This morning as V and Liam were eating scrambled eggs I read the news of this little boy's passing and I physically crumbled in tears, my heart breaks for this family. I can not imagine his mother's pain, the sorrow his whole family feels. Tears have been near all day. Then I saw people start to post hurtful things on facebook this afternoon. Here's the thing, his parents made the best choice for THEIR family, why in the world would you judge them after their child JUST passed!??! It's been less than 24 hours!!! My heart breaks.
Lucky V, it's been a slow week at work so he had already taken the day off to spend with Liam. Liam was super happy to have an extra ~45 mins of sleep and woke up in cheerful jabber. I took a little personal time at lunch to go home and snuggle him extra close (he seemed super happy about it too!).
My plea to you is to snuggle your babies extra close today, they are a true gift and blessing from God.
RIP Sweet Child, you are with God where there is no cancer.
This morning as V and Liam were eating scrambled eggs I read the news of this little boy's passing and I physically crumbled in tears, my heart breaks for this family. I can not imagine his mother's pain, the sorrow his whole family feels. Tears have been near all day. Then I saw people start to post hurtful things on facebook this afternoon. Here's the thing, his parents made the best choice for THEIR family, why in the world would you judge them after their child JUST passed!??! It's been less than 24 hours!!! My heart breaks.
Lucky V, it's been a slow week at work so he had already taken the day off to spend with Liam. Liam was super happy to have an extra ~45 mins of sleep and woke up in cheerful jabber. I took a little personal time at lunch to go home and snuggle him extra close (he seemed super happy about it too!).
My plea to you is to snuggle your babies extra close today, they are a true gift and blessing from God.
RIP Sweet Child, you are with God where there is no cancer.
November 9, 2012
Juggling
Some days I think I rock at this whole super-wife, rockstar-working-mom gig. Then there are weeks like this one. Oy vey! I'm sitting at work sipping a much needed latte and I could easily fall fast asleep right here, right now.
Some weeks I can rock out five or six healthy dinners, get lots of quality time in with Liam, have the whole house fairly well organized, all the bills paid early and even get a workout or two in. Not this week, it's Friday morning and I haven't gotten a single workout in, there is hope for tomorrow...kinda. The bills that are due this week are paid but I'm not ahead of the game like I want to be. Some of the house is clean and I made....one healthy dinner. In all fairness with Liam's fever that lasted Monday-Thursday morning I was just making him things I knew he would eat so he would eat something (homemade mac and cheese with peas). I haven't skimped on the quality time with Liam because it's always at the top of my priority list. I only straightened my hair today because we have a meeting with the builder right after work, otherwise I'd be rocking wet-hair-pulled-into-a-ponytail style.
I'm exhausted. I feel like I'm just barely keeping up and no where near getting ahead. I feel like I'm juggling but I keep dropping all the balls. I don't feel like a failure though because I'm still trying, you only fail if you give up. All I can do is make a list and start checking things off one-by-one.
I'm sure all moms feel this way at times, maybe we put too much pressure on ourselves, who knows. I don't think I'll ever be a "whatever" kind of mom, I'm always going to want to have it all; tons of quality time with Liam, clean house, healthy dinners, finances in check, happy family, career....I want it all and damn it I'm going to bust my ass until I have as much of this dream as I can.
Not entirely sure if there is a point in there, just a healthy dose of honesty about this week. I'm just glad the election is over, we all know the result know so maybe people will keep a few more opinions to themselves, one can hope!
Some weeks I can rock out five or six healthy dinners, get lots of quality time in with Liam, have the whole house fairly well organized, all the bills paid early and even get a workout or two in. Not this week, it's Friday morning and I haven't gotten a single workout in, there is hope for tomorrow...kinda. The bills that are due this week are paid but I'm not ahead of the game like I want to be. Some of the house is clean and I made....one healthy dinner. In all fairness with Liam's fever that lasted Monday-Thursday morning I was just making him things I knew he would eat so he would eat something (homemade mac and cheese with peas). I haven't skimped on the quality time with Liam because it's always at the top of my priority list. I only straightened my hair today because we have a meeting with the builder right after work, otherwise I'd be rocking wet-hair-pulled-into-a-ponytail style.
I'm exhausted. I feel like I'm just barely keeping up and no where near getting ahead. I feel like I'm juggling but I keep dropping all the balls. I don't feel like a failure though because I'm still trying, you only fail if you give up. All I can do is make a list and start checking things off one-by-one.
I'm sure all moms feel this way at times, maybe we put too much pressure on ourselves, who knows. I don't think I'll ever be a "whatever" kind of mom, I'm always going to want to have it all; tons of quality time with Liam, clean house, healthy dinners, finances in check, happy family, career....I want it all and damn it I'm going to bust my ass until I have as much of this dream as I can.
Not entirely sure if there is a point in there, just a healthy dose of honesty about this week. I'm just glad the election is over, we all know the result know so maybe people will keep a few more opinions to themselves, one can hope!
November 5, 2012
V Plays Stay at Home Dadda
Liam was acting off yesterday, we chalked it up to the time change.....but boy was he grumpy! Flash to this morning, Liam woke up crying really hard. This is not normal for him at all, usually he happily wakes and calls out to us (in mumble-y 18 month old chatter). Not today, today was full of loud cries. I hadn't gotten up for the day yet (my alarm was set to go off in another 5 mins at 6:10am), so I told V that I would change Liam's diaper. When I picked poor little Liam up he was physically on fire, I laid him on the changing table and started about stripping off his pjs, changing his diaper and taking his temp...... 102.5, yikes! V didn't miss a beat, he called off work to spend the day with Liam.
I quickly got ready then ran to the store for some juice and bananas (and bagels for V and I). I'm so thankful to have a husband that is willing to stay home with our sick child. I know a lot of men wouldn't even consider staying home and some women who wouldn't let their husband stay home to care for an ill child. I'm glad either of those things are true in my marriage. (Even though V' boss thinks it's totally nuts that V will stay home with Liam he still allows Vic to use sick time to care for Liam.) I called to check on Liam several times, each time V reassured me Liam was getting better and better.
Finally my work day was done, I rushes straight home and Liam was so very excited to see me! V reported that Liam hadn't eatten great but was snacking and his temp had some down a little. We spent a lovely evening of just chilling, eatting a little dinner and relaxing. I gave Liam a second dose of infant IB profrin and now his temp is just slightly over 100 degrees. A few minutes before we would have normally put Liam to bed he picked up a blanket off the floor and walked into his room, he was clearly ready! We did our normal routine of; clean diaper, jammies, sippy of water and sit on my lap while Dadda reads and when we put Liam into his crib he rolled on his side and was out before we turned off the light!
I quickly got ready then ran to the store for some juice and bananas (and bagels for V and I). I'm so thankful to have a husband that is willing to stay home with our sick child. I know a lot of men wouldn't even consider staying home and some women who wouldn't let their husband stay home to care for an ill child. I'm glad either of those things are true in my marriage. (Even though V' boss thinks it's totally nuts that V will stay home with Liam he still allows Vic to use sick time to care for Liam.) I called to check on Liam several times, each time V reassured me Liam was getting better and better.
Finally my work day was done, I rushes straight home and Liam was so very excited to see me! V reported that Liam hadn't eatten great but was snacking and his temp had some down a little. We spent a lovely evening of just chilling, eatting a little dinner and relaxing. I gave Liam a second dose of infant IB profrin and now his temp is just slightly over 100 degrees. A few minutes before we would have normally put Liam to bed he picked up a blanket off the floor and walked into his room, he was clearly ready! We did our normal routine of; clean diaper, jammies, sippy of water and sit on my lap while Dadda reads and when we put Liam into his crib he rolled on his side and was out before we turned off the light!
October 25, 2012
Goodbye Morning Nap, Hello Molars!
Holy Smokes, it's true when they say your child(ren) grow up so fast! It
feels like just yesterday Liam couldn't hold up his own head how he's a running
fool!
A few weeks ago Liam started to transition out of his morning nap and like all other things so far we've let him take the lead on being ready or not. He was clearly ready, so we had Nanna (who watches him 4 days/week) encourage it a little. Within just two weeks he was fully transitioned, we had one little set back when he wasn't feeling so great but now we are clear on the side of no return. And ya know what? I'm so happy! I know a lot of parents morn the loss of the morning nap because they fit in more "me" time or clean or whatnot and I certainly did use it as "me" time on Saturdays. BUT this whole single two hour nap in the middle of the day is delightful! We can leave the house for more than two hours at a time, why hello going to church! Liam is clearly happy with the change as well. It makes fitting a weekend workout in a little trickier for me but it's ok, I'd rather have the extra time with Liam anyway.
And in similar news the kid has a mouth full of teeth! Seriously! I had no idea this is how teething went! He started in March and it's been pretty much back to back teeth! Now he's getting molars! Molars! What?! He doesn't seem old enough for this business! The poor little guy, man they tell you molars are a b---h and they are! I couldn't for the life of me figure out why he'd been so incredibly grumpy lately then I stuck my finger in his mouth, because that is what moms do....and hello THREE molars trying to come in (one had at least broken through the skin and two others are super puffy). Duh Jen! Gosh I felt like a bad mom, all my kiddo wanted was teething tablets!!! And he was a saint after I gave them to him. This whole parenting thing sure has a learning curve!
A few weeks ago Liam started to transition out of his morning nap and like all other things so far we've let him take the lead on being ready or not. He was clearly ready, so we had Nanna (who watches him 4 days/week) encourage it a little. Within just two weeks he was fully transitioned, we had one little set back when he wasn't feeling so great but now we are clear on the side of no return. And ya know what? I'm so happy! I know a lot of parents morn the loss of the morning nap because they fit in more "me" time or clean or whatnot and I certainly did use it as "me" time on Saturdays. BUT this whole single two hour nap in the middle of the day is delightful! We can leave the house for more than two hours at a time, why hello going to church! Liam is clearly happy with the change as well. It makes fitting a weekend workout in a little trickier for me but it's ok, I'd rather have the extra time with Liam anyway.
And in similar news the kid has a mouth full of teeth! Seriously! I had no idea this is how teething went! He started in March and it's been pretty much back to back teeth! Now he's getting molars! Molars! What?! He doesn't seem old enough for this business! The poor little guy, man they tell you molars are a b---h and they are! I couldn't for the life of me figure out why he'd been so incredibly grumpy lately then I stuck my finger in his mouth, because that is what moms do....and hello THREE molars trying to come in (one had at least broken through the skin and two others are super puffy). Duh Jen! Gosh I felt like a bad mom, all my kiddo wanted was teething tablets!!! And he was a saint after I gave them to him. This whole parenting thing sure has a learning curve!
September 27, 2012
That time Liam said "Doggie" Perfectly
I will confess, this is the most challenging time I've had has a parent. Liam can make sounds but not words (other than; Dadda, Momma, Nanna, Yum). I feel more lost now than ever before when trying to uncover what he wants. Part of that is what he wants changes every .09 seconds. I love that he can walk and giggle, he points very well which helps but the lack of verbal communication, coupled with his frustration and whining, its a challenge for me. I want so much to know what he wants, to help him. After 17 attempts (milk? walk? blocks?) we usually discover his want/need, but there has to be a better way.
I've been thinking about this a lot lately, studies show boys develop slower verbally and faster with motor skills, so how can I help Liam to show me what he wants? What can I do? I racked my tiny, exhausted brain for days. We never did the whole baby sign language thing, I had read somewhere that it can delay verbal development further in boys so I decided it wasn't for us, but maybe now a few signs would help? I was torn.
Flash forward to this morning; V, Liam and I are all chilling in the living room playing before we all leave for the day. It was one of those rare non-rushed mornings, we were all smiling, Liam was giggling with ultimately makes V and I laugh like crazy. Liam looked over at his Dinosaur walker toy, looks up at me and says "Doggie" perfectly. V and I looked at one another in shock so much so that Liam thought he'd done something wrong until we started to laugh and say Yay, Liam!!! I could care less that it wasn't really a doggie, it was perfect and a memory I will always cherish!
Another fun thing Liam says is "Dadda, N'mmmmm" when he likes his meal which is almost all meals, even when he's eating with me. Momma is Liam's emergency word, he only uses it when he gets hurt or is upset. Haha. He has a handful of other noises that single when he wants up or is happy, he's such a funny and happy boy.
I have to say I think it's God's perfect timing, he shows us that all things work out perfectly in his time if we just let them.
Much Love,
Jen
I've been thinking about this a lot lately, studies show boys develop slower verbally and faster with motor skills, so how can I help Liam to show me what he wants? What can I do? I racked my tiny, exhausted brain for days. We never did the whole baby sign language thing, I had read somewhere that it can delay verbal development further in boys so I decided it wasn't for us, but maybe now a few signs would help? I was torn.
Flash forward to this morning; V, Liam and I are all chilling in the living room playing before we all leave for the day. It was one of those rare non-rushed mornings, we were all smiling, Liam was giggling with ultimately makes V and I laugh like crazy. Liam looked over at his Dinosaur walker toy, looks up at me and says "Doggie" perfectly. V and I looked at one another in shock so much so that Liam thought he'd done something wrong until we started to laugh and say Yay, Liam!!! I could care less that it wasn't really a doggie, it was perfect and a memory I will always cherish!
Another fun thing Liam says is "Dadda, N'mmmmm" when he likes his meal which is almost all meals, even when he's eating with me. Momma is Liam's emergency word, he only uses it when he gets hurt or is upset. Haha. He has a handful of other noises that single when he wants up or is happy, he's such a funny and happy boy.
I have to say I think it's God's perfect timing, he shows us that all things work out perfectly in his time if we just let them.
Much Love,
Jen
September 11, 2012
One of Those Tough Moments
I've said it a thousand and one times...Liam is such a easy baby, now a easy toddler. He started sleeping through the night around 6 months, on his own with no sleep training. One day we stopped giving him bottles (around 12 months) and he didn't bat an eye. We didn't even know when he teethed for the first time. He's an easy going, happy-go-lucky boy.
But over the last few months he's had a rough time when I drop him off at Nanna's in the morning. Usually he'll just fuss, once in a while he cries big 'ol alligator tears (cue my breaking heart). Nanna has always tells me he stops by the time I'm to my car (so maybe 30 seconds). It's rough on me, I won't lie I've teared up too. Thankfully it's not everyday, some days he hardly seems to notice becuase he's playing with his buddies.
Today though. Oh man. Nanna reached for Liam and for the first time ever Liam wrapped his little hands around me and pressed into my chest and shook his little head "no". Can you hear that? It's my heart shattering. I rubbed his back and talked with Nanna for a moment before she tried again, Liam gave the same reaction. Ouch. Soon enough I had to go, I reassured him that I loved him and he'd have a good day and I'd be back very soon. He seemed more ok with me leaving but still wasn't happy about it. Nanna's daughter was there and made sure to tell me that even when Liam is really upset it really lasts less than a minute. I thanked her, told Liam I loved him and waved "bye-bye" and headed to work. (I don't believe in "sneaking out", I think for my child it would make the whole situation worse so I always wave).
Needless to say today was one of those tough moments.
Much Love,
Jen
But over the last few months he's had a rough time when I drop him off at Nanna's in the morning. Usually he'll just fuss, once in a while he cries big 'ol alligator tears (cue my breaking heart). Nanna has always tells me he stops by the time I'm to my car (so maybe 30 seconds). It's rough on me, I won't lie I've teared up too. Thankfully it's not everyday, some days he hardly seems to notice becuase he's playing with his buddies.
Today though. Oh man. Nanna reached for Liam and for the first time ever Liam wrapped his little hands around me and pressed into my chest and shook his little head "no". Can you hear that? It's my heart shattering. I rubbed his back and talked with Nanna for a moment before she tried again, Liam gave the same reaction. Ouch. Soon enough I had to go, I reassured him that I loved him and he'd have a good day and I'd be back very soon. He seemed more ok with me leaving but still wasn't happy about it. Nanna's daughter was there and made sure to tell me that even when Liam is really upset it really lasts less than a minute. I thanked her, told Liam I loved him and waved "bye-bye" and headed to work. (I don't believe in "sneaking out", I think for my child it would make the whole situation worse so I always wave).
Needless to say today was one of those tough moments.
Much Love,
Jen
September 7, 2012
Sometimes I'm All Puppies and Rainbows
And today is one of those days! I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that I've gotten a lot of physical activity in this week. Two days this week the smoke [from nearby forest fires] had cleared out enough for walks and last night V convinced me to go to the gym You always feel so great afterward and always regret it when you don't go.... He was so right. Oh the endorphins, glorious endorphins!
When I'm feeling this good I always try and take inventory Why do I feel sooo good? I guess part of it is to be thankful and perhaps remember these good things when things don't seem so great.
Today's Happy Things Inventory (in no specific order)
-Work is good, I recently had my mid-year review and it was fantastic (dare I say I'm sure I'll get a fantastic raise this year?)
-Liam is amazing, as usual. He's walking, right on the cusp of completely shedding crawling, holy moly!
-I have gotten in four days of physical activity! (Since Monday was a holiday I took a Spin class while Liam napped, walks on Tues & Weds with Liam and a 30 min run last night. GLORIOUS!)
-Our car is officially paid off, very much ahead of schedule!
-I had a pretty interesting situation arise recently, while it didn't work out it has sparked a interest in me that I'm going to go after. Yay for adventures! (More details on this as soon as I get them worked out!)
-V and I are doing pretty good, which is a far cry from a few months ago so I'll take it. Progress is progress.
-I'm wearing a new and adorable dress that makes me feel pretty. This is the dress.
-It's FRIDAY!
I'm sure there is much more but these things alone make my heart over flower today.
Much Love,
Jen
When I'm feeling this good I always try and take inventory Why do I feel sooo good? I guess part of it is to be thankful and perhaps remember these good things when things don't seem so great.
Today's Happy Things Inventory (in no specific order)
-Work is good, I recently had my mid-year review and it was fantastic (dare I say I'm sure I'll get a fantastic raise this year?)
-Liam is amazing, as usual. He's walking, right on the cusp of completely shedding crawling, holy moly!
-I have gotten in four days of physical activity! (Since Monday was a holiday I took a Spin class while Liam napped, walks on Tues & Weds with Liam and a 30 min run last night. GLORIOUS!)
-Our car is officially paid off, very much ahead of schedule!
-I had a pretty interesting situation arise recently, while it didn't work out it has sparked a interest in me that I'm going to go after. Yay for adventures! (More details on this as soon as I get them worked out!)
-V and I are doing pretty good, which is a far cry from a few months ago so I'll take it. Progress is progress.
-I'm wearing a new and adorable dress that makes me feel pretty. This is the dress.
-It's FRIDAY!
I'm sure there is much more but these things alone make my heart over flower today.
Much Love,
Jen
August 24, 2012
A Day In the Life {of a Working Mom}
I saw a post similar to this on a stay-at-home-mom blog and thought it would be fun to compare.
A Typical Day;
6:10 am I get up after hitting the snooze once, I can hear my coffee brewing and I want to be out of the shower before it's done (I have a coffee maker with a timer that I load with grounds the night before it is HEAVEN!)
6:33 am I'm out of the shower, dressed, sipping coffee and putting on make up. Fingers crossed to have my hair done before Liam is up, this is rare.
6:45 am V gets Liam up, brings him into the kitchen and feeds him, today's breakfast is cut up banana and vanilla yogurt with some milk and a few honeynut cheerios. I'm sssoooo close to being done with my hair, darn it!
6:50 am I'm finally done getting ready, I take Liam into the living room and play with him on the floor while I sip some coffee and eat my breakfast (vanilla yogurt with vanilla/almond granola and a few dark chocolate chips). We always have the national news on but I rarely hear much.
7:20 am V starts to prepare for work, I dress Liam for the day, brush his hair and teeth, then continue playing.
7:38 am I pull together anything Liam will need for his day with Nanna and my leftovers, we load up and head out.
7:56 am we pull up to Nanna's, go in chat with her about anything necessary, I leave for work (Liam typically cries a little when I leave now, it's hard but Nanna has told me it never lasts more than 30 seconds, I choose to believe her).
8:10 am-4:30 pm I work.
4:55 pm I pick up Liam at Nanna's. I always ask if he took both naps, ate well, poo'd etc.
5:15 pm Liam and I get home, Liam likes to eat immediately so I put him in his highchair with a snack which today was watermelon and begin on dinner (note to self get better at using crockpot). Today I baked some chicken breasts and prepared salad (Liam's dinner is a small portion of whatever we eat, I also made some peas for him which are one of his favorites!)
5:35 pm V is working late so I eat with Liam, we are all done with dinner so we head to the livingroom for playtime.
6:04 pm V gets home from work, he eats and showers since he had a long day.
6:20 pm-7:20 pm we play with Liam, practice walking, play with blocks etc. Sometimes we'll go for a walk but V is extra tired and I'm certainly not well enough yet. We only do baths every few nights if it were a bath night we'd do one from 7:00 pm to about 7:20ish.
7:30p we start bedtime routine; Tonight I change Liam's diaper, brush his teeth and put him in jammies while V fills his humidifier, picks up the toys in the livingroom and straightens his bedding. Liam sits in my lap with his monkey and sippy while V reads two stories from Liam's children's bible, kisses and into the crib. We tell Liam we love him and "night night"
7:40-9p Time with V, we typically watch TV and just hang out (I often go running during this time or twice a week V plays video games). I usually put out my clothes for the next day and prepare leftovers for Liam and my lunches as well. I might do some light cleaning during this time...sometimes.
9:30p I often go to bed, I've always been a morning person.(with how sick I've been lately I've gone to bed as early as 8pm, sad.)
So there you have it, a typical Thursday in our lives. It's pretty organized, because it has to be but honestly I like it that way.
Much Love,
Jen
A Typical Day;
6:10 am I get up after hitting the snooze once, I can hear my coffee brewing and I want to be out of the shower before it's done (I have a coffee maker with a timer that I load with grounds the night before it is HEAVEN!)
6:33 am I'm out of the shower, dressed, sipping coffee and putting on make up. Fingers crossed to have my hair done before Liam is up, this is rare.
6:45 am V gets Liam up, brings him into the kitchen and feeds him, today's breakfast is cut up banana and vanilla yogurt with some milk and a few honeynut cheerios. I'm sssoooo close to being done with my hair, darn it!
6:50 am I'm finally done getting ready, I take Liam into the living room and play with him on the floor while I sip some coffee and eat my breakfast (vanilla yogurt with vanilla/almond granola and a few dark chocolate chips). We always have the national news on but I rarely hear much.
7:20 am V starts to prepare for work, I dress Liam for the day, brush his hair and teeth, then continue playing.
7:38 am I pull together anything Liam will need for his day with Nanna and my leftovers, we load up and head out.
7:56 am we pull up to Nanna's, go in chat with her about anything necessary, I leave for work (Liam typically cries a little when I leave now, it's hard but Nanna has told me it never lasts more than 30 seconds, I choose to believe her).
8:10 am-4:30 pm I work.
4:55 pm I pick up Liam at Nanna's. I always ask if he took both naps, ate well, poo'd etc.
5:15 pm Liam and I get home, Liam likes to eat immediately so I put him in his highchair with a snack which today was watermelon and begin on dinner (note to self get better at using crockpot). Today I baked some chicken breasts and prepared salad (Liam's dinner is a small portion of whatever we eat, I also made some peas for him which are one of his favorites!)
5:35 pm V is working late so I eat with Liam, we are all done with dinner so we head to the livingroom for playtime.
6:04 pm V gets home from work, he eats and showers since he had a long day.
6:20 pm-7:20 pm we play with Liam, practice walking, play with blocks etc. Sometimes we'll go for a walk but V is extra tired and I'm certainly not well enough yet. We only do baths every few nights if it were a bath night we'd do one from 7:00 pm to about 7:20ish.
7:30p we start bedtime routine; Tonight I change Liam's diaper, brush his teeth and put him in jammies while V fills his humidifier, picks up the toys in the livingroom and straightens his bedding. Liam sits in my lap with his monkey and sippy while V reads two stories from Liam's children's bible, kisses and into the crib. We tell Liam we love him and "night night"
7:40-9p Time with V, we typically watch TV and just hang out (I often go running during this time or twice a week V plays video games). I usually put out my clothes for the next day and prepare leftovers for Liam and my lunches as well. I might do some light cleaning during this time...sometimes.
9:30p I often go to bed, I've always been a morning person.(with how sick I've been lately I've gone to bed as early as 8pm, sad.)
So there you have it, a typical Thursday in our lives. It's pretty organized, because it has to be but honestly I like it that way.
Much Love,
Jen
July 18, 2012
What to Expect Giveaway
Hello Peeps!
I've forgotten to post about this more times than I can count but I have my first ever give away over on my Fitness Blog Wildflower Fitness. It's for a What to Expect Book. Please pop over and sign up, it closes Friday at midnight.
Much Love
-Jen
I've forgotten to post about this more times than I can count but I have my first ever give away over on my Fitness Blog Wildflower Fitness. It's for a What to Expect Book. Please pop over and sign up, it closes Friday at midnight.
Much Love
-Jen
June 29, 2012
Feeding a Tiny Person
When we first starting giving Liam solids around 5 months I remember thinking this isn't so bad! Until we ran through all the basic purees. Then it was like hmmmm....what else can I make him? (I made ~90% of Liam's food, it was easy even for this working momma!). As Liam grew I'd try to change it up with the ultimate goal being...I didn't want to raise a picky eater! I tried hard to expose him to a wide variety of foods, still do! Overall I think I did a good job, he eats just about anything and has even grown to like carrots (once his arch enemy).
Now that Liam is One Year Old! (How did that happen?) I feel like he's in this brand new place, he can eat a vast majority of things we eat! It's wonderful, most of the time. We just introduced Whole Cow's Milk and in true Liam fashion he likes it. We are in the process of eliminating bottles as well, almost there!
Here's the thing. I sorta liked it a bit more when Liam was around 8-9 months, when there were still things I felt he wasn't ready for so I was making him a meal and making us a different one. It really wasn't all that bad, most of the time I had things I could throw together quickly for him that were healthy. Liam loves to eat right when we get home, right when we get him...5pm sharp. (V doesn't get home until about 6pm). Sometimes when I felt lazy I'd make Liam his healthy little dinner and skimp on V and I (or we'd have something super easy like cereal). Now that Liam is big enough to eat most things we eat so it's silly, and way too much work, to make two dinners....but I don't always feel like eating a healthy dinner! Most of the time yes, not always though. But my Momma brain doesn't really want Liam eating these less healthy items.
In the grand scheme of things I realize one less healthy dinner is not the end of the world but my stance is this: He has his whole lifetime to eat whatever he wants, I'm responsible for giving him a healthy foundation. I guess I just need to be more prepared and plan out our dinners a week at a time, that's going to take some motivation!
These are the things that I think far too much about! Someone tell me I'm not the only one who thinks (or once thought) way too much about this!
Much Love
-Jen
Now that Liam is One Year Old! (How did that happen?) I feel like he's in this brand new place, he can eat a vast majority of things we eat! It's wonderful, most of the time. We just introduced Whole Cow's Milk and in true Liam fashion he likes it. We are in the process of eliminating bottles as well, almost there!
Here's the thing. I sorta liked it a bit more when Liam was around 8-9 months, when there were still things I felt he wasn't ready for so I was making him a meal and making us a different one. It really wasn't all that bad, most of the time I had things I could throw together quickly for him that were healthy. Liam loves to eat right when we get home, right when we get him...5pm sharp. (V doesn't get home until about 6pm). Sometimes when I felt lazy I'd make Liam his healthy little dinner and skimp on V and I (or we'd have something super easy like cereal). Now that Liam is big enough to eat most things we eat so it's silly, and way too much work, to make two dinners....but I don't always feel like eating a healthy dinner! Most of the time yes, not always though. But my Momma brain doesn't really want Liam eating these less healthy items.
In the grand scheme of things I realize one less healthy dinner is not the end of the world but my stance is this: He has his whole lifetime to eat whatever he wants, I'm responsible for giving him a healthy foundation. I guess I just need to be more prepared and plan out our dinners a week at a time, that's going to take some motivation!
These are the things that I think far too much about! Someone tell me I'm not the only one who thinks (or once thought) way too much about this!
Much Love
-Jen
Child-free Time
I will be the first to tell you I don't like spending time away from my child. Judge if you must. I get about an hour before work and less than three hours after work with him each day, anything other than Liam time can wait until after he's asleep or the weekends. This has taught me mad time management skills, I thought I was organized pre-Liam, Ha!
However somethings are just impossible with my little sidekick...well at my side. Like preparing for a mini family vacay. About once a month we let Liam sleep over at V's parent's house. Usually we use this time to get extra chores done and maybe sleep in a little on a Saturday morning. This week I just knew we couldn't get as prepared as we wanted with little Liam crawling behind us and it would be impossible for one of us to get everything done after he went to sleep, hence Liam got to sleep over at G'ma & G'pa's! He loves it there, we got a ton done....win-win. (Aside from the fact that I miss him like crazy and it's only been 24 hours, I can't pick him up for another 8, boo work-boo!)
One confession I'll make; I so enjoyed sleeping an extra 45 minutes this morning, taking a nice long shower and taking my sweet time straightening my hair this morning. I ate my breakfast slowly and didn't have to pack up Liam and the car and drive the 20 or so miles ('round trip) only to rush to work. This morning has been kinda lazy and wonderful. I even had the house all to myself for a half hour because V goes to work before I do, sweet silence how I love thee! I miss Liam more than I can say but I've enjoyed the free time, if only for a few hours.
Now it's off to work, I can't wait for our mini-vaca!
However somethings are just impossible with my little sidekick...well at my side. Like preparing for a mini family vacay. About once a month we let Liam sleep over at V's parent's house. Usually we use this time to get extra chores done and maybe sleep in a little on a Saturday morning. This week I just knew we couldn't get as prepared as we wanted with little Liam crawling behind us and it would be impossible for one of us to get everything done after he went to sleep, hence Liam got to sleep over at G'ma & G'pa's! He loves it there, we got a ton done....win-win. (Aside from the fact that I miss him like crazy and it's only been 24 hours, I can't pick him up for another 8, boo work-boo!)
One confession I'll make; I so enjoyed sleeping an extra 45 minutes this morning, taking a nice long shower and taking my sweet time straightening my hair this morning. I ate my breakfast slowly and didn't have to pack up Liam and the car and drive the 20 or so miles ('round trip) only to rush to work. This morning has been kinda lazy and wonderful. I even had the house all to myself for a half hour because V goes to work before I do, sweet silence how I love thee! I miss Liam more than I can say but I've enjoyed the free time, if only for a few hours.
Now it's off to work, I can't wait for our mini-vaca!
June 22, 2012
Celebrating My One Year Old
This Saturday friends and family will gather and celebrate my little boy's first birthday. Little boy, not really a baby any more. He's waving like mad and side-steps around furniture, walking is on the horizon!
My bestie is making mounds of sweets, I've got almost all the decor ready now as long as the weather plays nice we should have a fun little time. I've planned a few games that the kids can play if they'd like, the adults can just mingle and hang out. (V's family is so big that we invited 60 people almost all of which are solely family).
I'm excited to celebrate him with those who love him!
My bestie is making mounds of sweets, I've got almost all the decor ready now as long as the weather plays nice we should have a fun little time. I've planned a few games that the kids can play if they'd like, the adults can just mingle and hang out. (V's family is so big that we invited 60 people almost all of which are solely family).
I'm excited to celebrate him with those who love him!
June 13, 2012
A year ago today I was in labor....
It's hard to believe. I've spent the whole day glancing at the clock and remembering exactly what was going on at that time one year ago today. (You can read Liam's birth story here.) I'm finding it difficult to put into words the emotions I've experienced today but it's been wonderful to look back on. I'm literally sitting crying as I type and re-type this trying to find the right words to express the joy I have because of this little boy, the happiness he's brought to my life in the last year and what a blessing he is and I can't. There are no words to express how much I love him, how much I love being his mom and how I would do anything, literally anything, for him. All I can say is I believe in miracles, I know they happen because I'm a mom and when you look at me [medically] on paper I probably never should have been able to have a baby and I do, I have the most amazing baby boy on the planet and I am the luckiest momma there is. One year ago today my life changed forever because I was in the process of welcoming my son.Much Love
-Jen
May 22, 2012
More Milestones Coming
I can hardly believe I'm about to type this but I had to book Liam's first hair cut. The boy was born with hair, not a ton but it's gotten long and very curly! No matter what I do he looks super disheveled at the end of each day, and I'm worried that sooner or later people will ask me if I have a little girl, so hair cut time it is. I'm going to cry for sure, I teared up just making the appointment.
This Saturday Liam will have his first hair cut, then on Sunday we are having his One Year pictures taken (along with some family ones). It seems like just yesterday I was having his new born pictures taken! I can hardly believe that this time last year I was full term, super swollen and just waiting for my miracle baby to be in my arms. My heart overflows.
Much Love,
Jen
This Saturday Liam will have his first hair cut, then on Sunday we are having his One Year pictures taken (along with some family ones). It seems like just yesterday I was having his new born pictures taken! I can hardly believe that this time last year I was full term, super swollen and just waiting for my miracle baby to be in my arms. My heart overflows.
Much Love,
Jen
May 10, 2012
1st Year Products We Loved Pt 1
This is part one because I know myself, I'll remember something I LOVE tomorrow! LOL!
I've been meaning to do one of these posts and with so many expectant moms out there right now I thought it would be fun. In no specific order.......
Fisher Price Space Saver Highchair The name about says it all! I started using this at about 5 months when Liam was clearly interested in food, we never looked back. These days Liam hardly takes a bottle so he and the Space Saver are very close. The seat reclines if you wanted to give a small baby a bottle and not hold them (which is odd but each to their own), the tray comes off easy and the straps/cover come off easy to wash. You would have no idea my kid has had so much pasta and noodles, ours still looks brand new!
Playtex Bottles & Liners; I was only able to breast feed Liam until 3 months, then he ate through my stash until he was just shy of 5 months. I'm not the most green momma around but it saved my sanity to not wash bottles all the time.
Dr Oz's "You Raising Your Child" by far my favorite parenting book, but I'm also a huge Dr Oz fan. I read his "You having a Baby" while pregnant and really liked it as well.
3 Things for your Baby "Medicine Cabinet":
1. Tooth Brush & Tooth Paste...Liam loves having his teeth brushed, I think because we would brush his gums once and a while before he had teeth!
2. Gas Drops....You will need them and you will be thankful you have them, trust me!
3. Saline Drops....We've only needed these twice, Liam gets these yucky drippy nose issues when teething and without the drops he can't breathe well at night and does sleep.
Aveeno: Liam has a little sensitive skin, he really loves this lotion....I may like it a little too!
Baby Trend Jogging Stroller: By far my favorite FAVORITE item EVER! Our Baby Trend Jogging Stroller!! My dearest friend's mom gave this to me at my baby shower, I was shocked! Liam and I have put countless miles on it already! By the end of this summer it may need new tires!!
Lastly our Temperature Turtle! Being a first time mom I was always unsure about the water, no guessing with this guy! He just recently passed on and I'm confident in my bath-running skills to not need a new one....he sure is cute though!
Any momma's (or momma's-to-be) care to share what you loved?
Much Love,
Jen
I've been meaning to do one of these posts and with so many expectant moms out there right now I thought it would be fun. In no specific order.......
Fisher Price Space Saver Highchair The name about says it all! I started using this at about 5 months when Liam was clearly interested in food, we never looked back. These days Liam hardly takes a bottle so he and the Space Saver are very close. The seat reclines if you wanted to give a small baby a bottle and not hold them (which is odd but each to their own), the tray comes off easy and the straps/cover come off easy to wash. You would have no idea my kid has had so much pasta and noodles, ours still looks brand new!
Playtex Bottles & Liners; I was only able to breast feed Liam until 3 months, then he ate through my stash until he was just shy of 5 months. I'm not the most green momma around but it saved my sanity to not wash bottles all the time.
Dr Oz's "You Raising Your Child" by far my favorite parenting book, but I'm also a huge Dr Oz fan. I read his "You having a Baby" while pregnant and really liked it as well.
3 Things for your Baby "Medicine Cabinet":
1. Tooth Brush & Tooth Paste...Liam loves having his teeth brushed, I think because we would brush his gums once and a while before he had teeth!
2. Gas Drops....You will need them and you will be thankful you have them, trust me!
3. Saline Drops....We've only needed these twice, Liam gets these yucky drippy nose issues when teething and without the drops he can't breathe well at night and does sleep.
Aveeno: Liam has a little sensitive skin, he really loves this lotion....I may like it a little too!
Any momma's (or momma's-to-be) care to share what you loved?
Much Love,
Jen
April 26, 2012
Torn Between Nana & G'ma pt 2
You may recall that I recently wrote about being torn between Nana (who watches Liam 4x/week) and G'ma wanting to retire and watch Liam full time. Essentially I wanted Liam to stay with Nanna and V wanted the opposite.....
V and I finally found time to sit down and have a long and thoughtful discussion on the topic. Parenting isn't always easy, for me a vast majority of it comes naturally but some discussions seem like mountains, this was one of them....and as usual V and I had differing opinions. I pride myself on being able to see both sides of most things most of the time, V is a little more black and white. My train of thought was; while Liam would benefit from the extended amount of time with G'ma & family ultimately he would benefit more from staying with Nanna at least 3 days/week. It important for G'ma to stay G'ma and not become our employee, I want her to enjoy and look forward to her time with Liam and additionally if she is able to work from home it will not be realistic to get work done and watch a toddler. Nanna is family to me, not only does Liam love her and the two girls Nanna watches but at this point he's going to be an only child and it's important for him to have the exposure to other children. I was a bit amazed when V agreed. We decided on: Nanna watching Liam 3 days per week and G'ma could watch him 2 day/week, those days must be consecutive because we believe it's important for Liam to have consistency. Right now G'ma hasn't made a firm decision on when she will retire so we are just going to leave things where they are and when her decision is made we'll advise her of ours. Whew, one more decision down now only like 4 million more to go! :)
Much Love,
Jen
V and I finally found time to sit down and have a long and thoughtful discussion on the topic. Parenting isn't always easy, for me a vast majority of it comes naturally but some discussions seem like mountains, this was one of them....and as usual V and I had differing opinions. I pride myself on being able to see both sides of most things most of the time, V is a little more black and white. My train of thought was; while Liam would benefit from the extended amount of time with G'ma & family ultimately he would benefit more from staying with Nanna at least 3 days/week. It important for G'ma to stay G'ma and not become our employee, I want her to enjoy and look forward to her time with Liam and additionally if she is able to work from home it will not be realistic to get work done and watch a toddler. Nanna is family to me, not only does Liam love her and the two girls Nanna watches but at this point he's going to be an only child and it's important for him to have the exposure to other children. I was a bit amazed when V agreed. We decided on: Nanna watching Liam 3 days per week and G'ma could watch him 2 day/week, those days must be consecutive because we believe it's important for Liam to have consistency. Right now G'ma hasn't made a firm decision on when she will retire so we are just going to leave things where they are and when her decision is made we'll advise her of ours. Whew, one more decision down now only like 4 million more to go! :)
Much Love,
Jen
April 10, 2012
Torn between Nanna & G'ma
I'm in a bit of a pickle with our childcare situation.....
"Nanna" is a family friend we pay to watch Liam, she has had him 4 days a week since he was 7 weeks old. She is amazing, she has done everything we've asked of her without batting an eye, she loves Liam and Liam loves her (and the two little girls Nanna watches). She is reasonably priced, her home is safe and I trust her.
But ever since Liam was born his G'ma (V's Mom) has wanted to quit her job and watch Liam full time. It seemed like a pipe dream until very recently. Basically G'ma wants to retire and watch Liam full time (she currently only watches him on Fridays because she's off). BUT G'ma and G'pa can't afford for her to not work just yet so she wants V and I to pay her to watch Liam. It's not a matter of money, I will gladly pay for childcare...
There are pros and cons to each. I am deeply concerned that her time with Liam will become work and she will not enjoy being a G'ma like she has. I know that Liam will benefit from having a deeper relationship with G'ma and G'pa (as well as Great G'ma who lives with G'ma & G'pa)....but I want Liam to be around other children too. I expect my rules to be followed, Liam is my child...I am his parent, I know what is best for him. G'ma has already broken two rules that hurt me deeply, the hurt wasn't intentional and has been addressed..... I just worry about loosing Nanna as Liam's primary care provider then being unhappy with G'ma. As far as Liam being around other children, G'ma has mentioned taking him to play dates etc which actually really bothers me, I'm his mom! I want to do the fun things, Nanna doesn't take Liam on play dates.... G'ma also mentioned perhaps she could watch Liam 2-4 days a week and Nanna could do the rest, personally this is a No. I don't want Liam bouncing all over the place to accommodate G'ma's lifestyle. I am a firm beleiver that children need consistency and thrive when they have structure.
Perhaps your thinking "Well then just keep Nanna as Liam's childcare provider." To be honest I wish I could, I wish it were that easy. I know the income helps Nanna and she has become like family to me. I know she doesn't want to watch the kiddos forever but at least for the next two years I know she is committed to us and the other kiddo's parents. It's no big surprise that V and I don't see eye-to-eye on this, he wants his mom to watch Liam and I would prefer to stay with Nanna. I don't want to hurt my mother-in-law's feelings, I love her but I don't want her to raise my child.
Oy. Anyone out there have any advice?
"Nanna" is a family friend we pay to watch Liam, she has had him 4 days a week since he was 7 weeks old. She is amazing, she has done everything we've asked of her without batting an eye, she loves Liam and Liam loves her (and the two little girls Nanna watches). She is reasonably priced, her home is safe and I trust her.
But ever since Liam was born his G'ma (V's Mom) has wanted to quit her job and watch Liam full time. It seemed like a pipe dream until very recently. Basically G'ma wants to retire and watch Liam full time (she currently only watches him on Fridays because she's off). BUT G'ma and G'pa can't afford for her to not work just yet so she wants V and I to pay her to watch Liam. It's not a matter of money, I will gladly pay for childcare...
There are pros and cons to each. I am deeply concerned that her time with Liam will become work and she will not enjoy being a G'ma like she has. I know that Liam will benefit from having a deeper relationship with G'ma and G'pa (as well as Great G'ma who lives with G'ma & G'pa)....but I want Liam to be around other children too. I expect my rules to be followed, Liam is my child...I am his parent, I know what is best for him. G'ma has already broken two rules that hurt me deeply, the hurt wasn't intentional and has been addressed..... I just worry about loosing Nanna as Liam's primary care provider then being unhappy with G'ma. As far as Liam being around other children, G'ma has mentioned taking him to play dates etc which actually really bothers me, I'm his mom! I want to do the fun things, Nanna doesn't take Liam on play dates.... G'ma also mentioned perhaps she could watch Liam 2-4 days a week and Nanna could do the rest, personally this is a No. I don't want Liam bouncing all over the place to accommodate G'ma's lifestyle. I am a firm beleiver that children need consistency and thrive when they have structure.
Perhaps your thinking "Well then just keep Nanna as Liam's childcare provider." To be honest I wish I could, I wish it were that easy. I know the income helps Nanna and she has become like family to me. I know she doesn't want to watch the kiddos forever but at least for the next two years I know she is committed to us and the other kiddo's parents. It's no big surprise that V and I don't see eye-to-eye on this, he wants his mom to watch Liam and I would prefer to stay with Nanna. I don't want to hurt my mother-in-law's feelings, I love her but I don't want her to raise my child.
Oy. Anyone out there have any advice?
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| I can relate. |
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