May 7, 2012

Would You Parent Differently?

I've heard this question asked of older generations, the whole "in retrospect" concept but that isn't exactly what I'm talking about here (although I gladly invite any advice etc).

What I'm focused on is this; If you knew the baby in your arms would be your only, would you parent him/her differently?  As the reality that Liam will be our only child finds rest in my soul I think about this question/topic often.  Knowing he'll be my only child and these days are fleeting I am so much more willing to snuggle him extra at bedtime, play longer in the tub etc.  I'm beyond grateful that I got to have one amazing baby, he defines Miracle Baby.

Some days are easier than others, I feel like this decision was taken from me due to my autoimmune disease but it's the smart thing to do, it's my reality and there isn't much that will change it.  I'm not saying I'm a better parent but I do think this perspective makes me more patient with Liam, I lavish my love on him even when I'm tired and would love some time to myself, I look closely at him with an intentional smile trying to soak up every single moment and store it in my soul.  I intentionally seek extra time with him, I schedule anything I can when he's napping (on the weekends) or asleep for the night (during the week).  Daily I promise him that no matter what I will be there for him, I will love him and support him. 

It's a hard thing to know; that regardless of whether or not you could have more shouldn't.  (I started to go into the details of why we have chosen to not have more children and it got a bit too emotional for me.  The facts are I have one amazing miracle baby that means the world to me, I have more than I could ever ask for and I am grateful.)

Much Love,

Edit to include: I kinda lost my train of thought last night....So what I was getting at is, if you knew that baby/child in your arms would be your one and only, do you think you would do anything differently?  I'd love to hear feedback!

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